1. And lo, the Goddess was praised in all the Lands of the Earth, although not by many, and she was praised by many names, yea, close even to the number given to Aragorn, son of Arathorn, who is called Strider, Longshanks, Windfoot, Estel, Elessar, Telcontar, The Heir of Isildur, He Of Too Many Names, and others besides.
2. And the Great Goddess also has many names, with which she is praised across the sphere of the World. And the names of the Goddess are many, for she is called The Lady of the Hat, which in the Common Tongue is rendered 'Hat Lady'. And she is called GreyLadyBast, for this is her True and Proper name. And yet, she is also named Great One, for she is great, and yea, there is but one of her.
3. But these are not all the names of the Goddess. For many, who are known as the lazy, refer to her as Bast, GLBast, and yea, sometimes merely GLB. And they shall be smited, unless they are Deserving, and show that they are Deserving by worshipping the Goddess.
4. And all the peoples of the World shall quail before the Greatness of our Patron Goddess, for she is great, and has many names. And in time she will be praised by all, save only those who are foolish and Suvian and deserve smiting.
5. All praise GreyLadyBast. Praise her with great praise. And lots of sacrifices.
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Step Away From The Cupboard